Becoming a mum can be a wonderful experience, full of a range of emotions and adjustments.
Motherhood is often not talked about openly with regards to the challenges that many women face, eg developing a healthy, nurturing relationship with your children while also being the disciplinarian.
Times have changed and many women are now working as well as running a household and being a parent and a wife. Social media often adds pressure because it takes things to the extreme and often contributes to people feeling inadequate as they may compare themselves to others. It’s important to remember that what you see on social media is often not a true representation of that person’s life, but a well-orchestrated façade.
The trick is to find a balance of what works best, specific to your life and your family’s needs.
Signs you are Playing the Supermum Game
Have you fallen victim to any of the following supermum myths?
- Putting time aside for myself to improve my health and wellbeing is selfish and taking time away from my kids.
- I should be able to do it all (parenting, running a household, working, being a wife etc) and cope perfectly while doing it, because other mothers do.
- My kids must like me all the time or I am failing as a parent.
- If I yell at my kids then I am again failing as a parent.
- My house must look wonderful all the time.
When stressed and overwrought mothers come to see me, they want to know how they can overcome the pressures they have placed on themselves. Together, we may try:
- Using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, which can be very helpful.
- Identifying and understanding your own values/goals and getting on track with them, not what society or social media says you should do.
- Burnout, Depression and Anxiety are all possible outcomes if you continue to ignore feeling overwhelmed. Getting professional help can put things in perspective, help you learn coping strategies and establish a routine that suits your family’s lifestyle.
- Making YOU part of the priority list, and nurturing yourself, so you can be around for as long as possible and live the meaningful life that you want.
If you are feeling overwhelmed with motherhood, you are certainly not alone! Getting extra help can be very useful in validating how you feel, helping you live your life according to your values, and bringing a sense of calm and fulfilment to your household. If you would like help tailored to you and your family, please don’t hesitate to contact me to arrange an appointment.
Leia’s primary focus is clinical child and adolescent psychology although she can treat individuals and couples of all ages. She has training and experience in a variety of evidence based treatment approaches, but is particularly passionate about providing parent support, including the 123 Magic program for children aged 2-12 years.
To make an appointment with Clinical Psychologist Leia Redman try Online Booking – Loganholme or call M1 Psychology (Loganholme) on (07) 3067 9129.